I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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