that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Randomize
