no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
How so I keep attracting the virgins? HOW?
You talk about your love for your ninja turtle onesie when you're drunk. Are you really surprised?
Randomize
