I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize
