It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
Randomize
