I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Randomize