hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You need Xanax blowdarts
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
