I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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