perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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