I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Randomize
