You work out of a Hotel?
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
so hungover. I'm actually considering eating the snow off the roof so I don't have to leave my bed
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
