just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Are my feet made of real feet?
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
