Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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