ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
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