do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
