We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
