We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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