she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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