I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Look, the coffee machine died a noble death. It was the way it would have wanted to go. It was a mercy exploding, really.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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