He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
