I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
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