hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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