She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
You took photos of my underwear around London the day after! THAT was too soon.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Why did u text me "I want to get drunk and go to pizza hut tomorrow. don't let me forget." at 3am??
That text was pretty fucking self-explanatory, man.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
