After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
