She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
