Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
