He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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