He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize