Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
