Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize