you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
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