we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
