No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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