so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
