her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
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