Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
