Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
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