I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Back of his car in the Starbucks parking lot WITH HIS APRON STILL ON. Check and Mate.
Holy shit. You won barista bingo AND the Triple Crown in one day.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
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