I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
