I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Remind me never to smoke before babysitting again. Ate an entire bottle of children's gummy vitamins.... not an easy thing to explain to parents.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
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