I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
