If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
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