Kiss
Puke
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Dude someone is playing the piano in the other room while I shit and it's making it really peaceful
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Randomize
