great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I am stoned and watching Pocahontas. I am letting the kids eat whatever they want. I am the best babysitter in the whole wide world
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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