Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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