I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
You know what, I don't care that I got too drunk and didn't make it into the boat party. If I had, I probably wouldn't have peed on you later while we soundly slept. I feel you need that in a best friendship.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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