I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Randomize
