you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
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