Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
