Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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