Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
